Stop

I'm in my room, turn off the light

Lay down in my bed every single night

But thoughts trickle down and I cannot sleep

Cause in our age depression is cheap



Roll over and over 'I'm ugly' I think

You suck, no one loves you, get up and drink

If you died no one would care

These types of thoughts are not quite rare



Rub my eyes and look around

I hear a strange familiar sound

'grab the knife and end it all'

This hiss comes and I start to stall



What if people miss me? 'They won't'

I love my life too much! 'You don't'

I could learn to hope! 'You can't'

My friends need me... 'Only to rant'



'No one would care and there is no hope,

Grab the knife it's the best way to cope'

The cold steel tingles against my bear skin

I just want it to end, is that a sin?



Another voice quietly whispers 'stop'

I freeze midair and hear a plop

I run back to my room and my curtains are torn

Suddenly I remember it's Pascha morn.



I drop the knife and rush to the cloth

Out of it flies a living moth

It goes out the window, up and away

And just like that I decide to stay



The bible behind me up on the shelf

Seems to take courage and declare itself

I hold in my hands the key to joy

I realize those thoughts were just a decoy



Christ saved me from a great, great loss

He saved me now as He did on the cross

My life has meaning and wholeness now

Because with creation I choose to bow.