No Strings Attached: Fame

him to his desk and held the chair until he was seated, then she smiled as sweetly as anyone could ever smile and went to the front of the class.

"Now children," she said, when everyone was sitting, "I want us to all try and do our work as if this is just another ordinary day, just like any other day. We all know who is in the classroom with us, but I want you to try very, very hard not to be distracted by that very special person!"

The first lessons went fairly smoothly. All Ernest got were admiring glances, especially from the girls, and a few notes, surreptitiously slipped on to his lap as students passed his desk. They all said the same sort of thing: "You're cool!" or "I really admire you!" or "Hello Mr. Wonderful!" or "I'm honoured to be so close to you!" and so on. It became rather tedious after a while, opening all these complements.

But the strangest thing was when the science class came along, and the teacher seemed to think Ernest was the only boy in the class worth teaching. He was always expecting Ernest to have a response to the science questions.

"I wonder if you have an answer to this one?" the teacher said, smiling at Ernest.

"Rain falls from the clouds because they turn over and all the drops fall off?" said Ernest, trying to remember what the book said.

"Well isn't that marvellous!" said the teacher, "After all the research by dozens of scientists, now Ernest has come up with a brand new theory on precipitation!"

The class looked admiringly at Ernest, and some of them took notes. The textbooks would have to be re-written, thanks to his brilliant insights.

"Are what makes the water rise up from the oceans?"

"The sea squeezes the water so hard it pops up" said Ernest.

More frantic scribbling and admiring glances. The teacher positively beamed.

It was even more peculiar in Math class. When the teacher asked the class to add up a column of figures, Ernest came up with an answer that was at least five hundred out, but the response was awe, rather than ire.

"Do you know what Ernest here has done?" the teacher said proudly, "Do you realize what a revolutionary genius we have with us? Not only has this prodigy come up with a whole new way of adding figures, but he has