Adam’s Lament

Does it make me less of a man
To admit I fail to understand?
The nightfall of this aftermath,
Me trudging on such desolate path.
Of all the trees in the garden,
Of all hearts, mine hardened.
T'was only fruit, only seed
Now thorns pierce to bleed?

Pieces of me begin to die
Why did I buy into this lie?
I feel with every exhaled breath
The loss of You and grip of death.
Now I watch son murder son
Then on the run. Will I have none?
Pure good ravaged by evil
Spelled out in this blood spilled.

Tears of inconsolable mother.
She asks how brother could kill brother.
My wife needs a strong leader.
Without You how can I feed her?
This broken man with broken hands,
Scraping off this broken land.
When will her seed break this curse?
Your tongue sends distant, empty words.

How many tears to mingle with blood?
When will withered gardens bud?
Your splendid design across creation
Torn down to devastation.
Knowledge unbridled, but You I lack.
Please, I just want to go back!
Rekindle the buried, once godly desire,
Call out that vile serpent as a liar!

Once You enriched me, lavished me;
Now You punish me, banish me.
This eternal distance slowly poisons me
Severing Your holy breath within me.
What have I gained, losing Your trust?
What will You hold when I am dust?
How to repair this I cannot fathom.
A second chance? A second Adam?

"So it is written, The first man Adam became a living being; the last Adam became a life-giving spirit. However, the spiritual is not first, but the natural, then the spiritual. The first man was from the earth, a man of dust; the second man is from heaven. Like the man of dust, so are those who are of the dust; like the man of heaven, so are those who are of heaven. And just as we have borne the image of the man of dust, we will also bear the image of the man of heaven."
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭15‬:‭45‬-‭49‬ ‭CSB‬‬